My best friend Benjamin Block is not feeling so hot. He's thrown up several times and skipped a days worth of classes. This could be the result of living a legend for the last fourteen days.
The last fourteen days.
Starting with Thanksgiving Break, Ben has burdened himself with the responsibility of not showering. When I say "not showering," I mean no soap or water. Every once in awhile Ben jests that he had just "taken a shower on the basketball court," though. In those times, it's not unusual to see me laughing/gagging. It is quite gross, but also legendary. How many opportunities like this will he have? How many people are willing to Ski everyday during Thanksgiving Break, play basketball, throw up, and study without showering. On top of all that, Ben has chosen to operate incognito by way of "Molestache." I'm telling you, the man is a legend. It is a hard lifestyle (constant pressure from people, smell, lack of self confidence, rashes), though many benefits do come with it. The Ladies absolutely love it. They can't keep their noses off the pheremones. For example, we attended a party last Friday and girls would just stand in front of him and stare. Stare directly at him from within three feet. Eventually, the girl would say something like "that's so gross!" Attention is attention, and Ben got it.
Today he called his mother and told her about the situation (being sick). She doesn't know how long he has gone with out hygiene, but she recommended that he take a shower. So, he talked to me about it.
I did all I could to stop him. You know, a lot of people have tried to make Ben shower. They use all sorts of methods to persuade him: logic, facts, peer-pressure,threats and even Google Fight. In my personal quest of avoiding water for a week, I also experienced this. The funniest of the list has to be the threats. "If you don't shower, I'm going to lather you with soap and rinse you in your sleep!" With pure thoughts intact, that's never a real intimidating phrase. Anyways, Ben disrobed and headed for the bathroom.
I really didn't want him to shower, so I gave him a pep talk. And while he was in the bathroom, soap in hand, he decided that he just might go on to be dirty another day. Praise God. Right now, Ben is still sick, and resting.
Question: Do you face or turn your back to the shower?